In Damascus when people stared at me(and they rarely did) it usually meant a good thing, staring usually just meant (your pretty) or (have I seen you somewhere) …
In my damascene university (AIU) there was girls with stripes in their hair, girls who wore headscarves, girls who wore crosses, girls who wore the newest cutest jeans , girls who didn’t give a damn what they wore, and I never once felt out of place or like I didn’t belong
However St.cloud Minnesota is a completely different story…here they have mastered the art of staring …I dress weird so the st.cloudians stare… I look weird so the Somalians stare, and I don’t belong anywhere…
This kind of staring is new to me, it makes me want to disappear ..to shrink down…to hide, my little sister would have dealt with this much better I can just see her buying a red top-hat and wearing it around on top of her headscarf so that she would give them something to stare at.. but me? I have always done my best to blend in , while remaining unique, In my own subtle way…of course now I stand out like a sore thumb, and I feel the eyes on me boring holes into me, sticking to me so that no shower can wash them off.
In Damascus, we had a day off on Christmas and a day off on Eid (the Muslim- Christmas for lack of a better description) but in good old st.cloud I have three classes on Eid…how would any of them feel if they had three classes on Christmas? Probably just as crappy as I do.. as homesick as I am …
st.cloud is star cloud :D... a red top hat eh? i like the idea :) its funny you know cuz like you always assume ppl in the Mideast are the intolerant ones, how interesting it is that its the diver open united states that has starring contests.
ReplyDeleteskip the classes
ReplyDeleteyou cant skip??!?!?!?!?! thats just ad, wear a red hat :D
ReplyDeleteyou can skip essma..spend the day with ur husband and go do some fun eid things. ive always skipped school and work on eid..people of other faiths make it a point to take off that way, so why shouldn't muslims? btw being a hijabi on long island wasn't fun either and I got plenty of stares. in fact at my old job, no one even spoke to me for months after i started there, it was very isolating. just give it time and you'll see things will get better!
ReplyDelete